Friday, 9 December 2016

How did I Moved On that Fast?

I’m not sure if I am capable of writing a little something about this issue. I don’t know where to start. But as promised to one of my closest guy friend, I will sum up everything I did for the past 5 months for me to fully recover from an unexpected break-up situation.

To be honest, I saw the “thing” coming. I felt that the relationship was soon to end. But still, I wasn’t that prepared. I thought I will end up cheating with my partner or fall in love with someone else as the reason for the break-up. But, it wasn't turned out that way.

Of course in every relationship, both can make a mistake. Both can have their own point of view. Mine was: I loved too much. I got jealous. End of the story.

I was too vulnerable to pain. I asked too much for attention. To be loved. To be appreciated. To be accepted. Failing a relationship which I thought was good and forever was a total pain. More to say, my pride was deeply hurt.

So, how did someone like me, a not-so-strong girl overcome this phase?

  • Hang out with Friends
Yes. Friends. My friends played a huge part on my moving-on situation. They've been there. Always there. They listened to my agonies, they gave me advised, and they stayed. They showed me that even when I failed with the wrong relationship, I will never be alone. Because they will always be there.

  • Travel as much as you can
March 2014 – Burot experience with my friends in the office. Everything started here. For me to help myself get back on the shape, I travel. Every month, whenever there is an invitation for an outing, get together, movie dates, mall hopping or any activities, as long as I am available, I join. I went to different places and tried new adventures.

  • Beer all the way!
They say that drinking beers won’t solve anything. When you’re sober, you’ll still get to remember everything. You can still feel the pain. But seriously, if there were no beers, I might never recover that fast. Haha. Drinking a bottle or two of beers, with the right people can really help.

  • Socialize with everybody
It’s not everyday that we meet new people. Being friendly is in my nature. I talk to everybody. During my moving on days, I tend to talk to different people aside from my friends. New people who doesn't know my story yet. Gladly, last March, our office expanded and more people got hired. I befriend some of them, I knew people from every account and I stayed nice. It did help.

  • Smile, have a crush, love again – there are many fishes in the ocean ;)
I think above everything else, what helped me the most is the idea that she’s not the only person in the world. I can still love and be loved. It’ll just take time. Also, someone did help me to move on (not that he knew any of this – he’s totally clueless). I focused my attention to him, gave anything that I can give, I was nice to him and so was he to me. As soon as I have totally moved on from my ex, my friendship with this guy has also ended.

  • Accept what needs to be accepted
It was a month or three after the break-up before I fully accepted the fact that we can never get back together. That the relationship has truly ended. It was hard to accept something like this but I HAD TO. I accepted the fact that I made a mistake but also opened my mind that not everything was my fault. I had to accept, though it hurt that she has found a new love. She fell out of love with me because she fell in love with someone else. I had to accept that some relationship won’t last.

  • Pray for the courage – talk to HIM
I may not look like a spiritual person but I do know how to pray. Actually, I didn't pray, I talked to God. I asked him to guide me, to help me get through this easily. I asked for the courage to leave everything behind for me to start the new chapter of my life. And from then, I believed that God has a better plan for me. He did put me on a better place.